Acknowledging Ring (Lardner)
His name was Fake I. Money and, if somebody had ta no, the I stood for IOU. You see, his pa was an wily ol’ coot and I got ta no hem. Never a day went by, he didn’t remine Fake that he give em that name so his head wouldn’t get sweeld when they paid em in IOU’s they called Federal Resereve Notes.
He was a cenerfielder, as graceful as Willie and Uncle Oscar Charleston, Fake I. Money was. He never did a play that didn’t get you thinkin bout the differenece tween fake money and real money. I’d say, “did you see Fake’s over the shuler catch” and I coud, I’m tellin you this tru, I coud feel the compoun inerest eatin away insie my debit card.
Fake was and Fake is but Fake I. Money was a beautiful basebal player. Man, he could play tha game.
~ Stephen J. Bergstrom
The Literary Fiction of Stephen J. Bergstrom 
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